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FullScope Pest & Lawn

Let's have a Dad joke thread and I will go first!

Let's have a Dad joke thread and I will go first!

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Cbear 5 OP 
~ 2 years, 5 mos ago   Aug 2, '23 8:46am  
 
@Maxsmom : Good one!!
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Cbear 5 OP 
~ 2 years, 5 mos ago   Aug 2, '23 9:31am  
Loading Image...
 
Free bee!
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Cbear 5 OP 
~ 2 years, 5 mos ago   Aug 2, '23 1:23pm  
Cbear : I AM the bad joke extraordinaire.
 
@Olaf : Show us whatcha got!
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Olaf 4
~ 2 years, 5 mos ago   Aug 2, '23 3:00pm  
Olaf : Show us whatcha got!
 
@Cbear :
Have you ever had a bad sausage?
It's the wurst.
 
What did the earthquake say when it was done?
Sorry, it was all my fault!
 
Why did the roofer go to the doctor?
He had shingles.
 
Why did the muffler repairman switch careers?
He was always coming home exhausted.
 
Why shouldn't you trust elm trees?
They seem shady.
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Cbear 5 OP 
~ 2 years, 5 mos ago   Aug 2, '23 3:24pm  
Cbear : Have you ever had a bad sausage? It's the wurst. What did the earthquake say when it was done? Sorry, it was all my fault! Why did the roofer go to the doctor? He had shingles. Why did the muffler repairman switch careers? He was always coming home exhausted. Why shouldn't you trust elm trees? They seem shady.
 
@Olaf : All funny nd thanks for the laughs.
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Jalil 3
~ 2 years, 5 mos ago   Aug 3, '23 11:19am  
My wife is thinking of leaving me because of my obsession with poker.
 
But I think she's bluffing.
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Jalil 3
~ 2 years, 5 mos ago   Aug 3, '23 11:23am  
Yesterday, I accidentally swallowed some food coloring.
 
The doctor says I'm OK, but I feel like
I've dyed a little inside.
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Jalil 3
~ 2 years, 5 mos ago   Aug 3, '23 11:24am  
I asked my girlfriend to meet me at the gym, but she never showed up.
 
That's how I knew we weren't going to work out.
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Maxsmom 7
~ 2 years, 5 mos ago   Aug 3, '23 11:25am  
My neighbor gave me a new roof. He said it was on the house.
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Maxsmom 7
~ 2 years, 5 mos ago   Aug 3, '23 11:26am  
Did you hear about the red and blue ships that collided? All the sailors were marooned
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Jalil 3
~ 2 years, 5 mos ago   Aug 3, '23 11:26am  
I wrote a book on how not to fall down the stairs.
 
It's a step by step guide.
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Maxsmom 7
~ 2 years, 5 mos ago   Aug 3, '23 11:26am  
What has a spine but no bones? A book
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Jalil 3
~ 2 years, 5 mos ago   Aug 3, '23 11:27am  
accidentally put my wallet in the freezer last night.
 
It turned out to be a good thing, though. I really needed some cold, hard cash.
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Maxsmom 7
~ 2 years, 5 mos ago   Aug 3, '23 11:29am  
Where do surfers learn to surf? At boarding school
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Floyd 10
~ 2 years, 5 mos ago   Aug 4, '23 10:03am  
I know a guy who builds boats in his attic...
 
His sails are through the roof.
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